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How Far Will a Man Go to Keep His Secret?

Last week the political world was all a buzz by the information that was released about U.S. Representative Tim Murphy of Pennsylvania. This conservative, pro-life activist was caught in a scandal where his affair with Shannon Edwards, a psychologist half his age, was exposed. What makes the whole thing worse is the text messages that where recovered between the two, during a pregnancy scare, where the Congressman urged Edwards to get an abortion.

A Facebook post by Tim Murphy on January 24 about abortion is what initially sparked the text conversation between him and Edwards. In his post he said: “The United States is one of just seven countries worldwide that permits elective abortion more than halfway through pregnancy (beyond 20 weeks). It is a tragic shame that America is leading the world in discarding and disregarding the most vulnerable," he wrote.

Murphy also noted in that post that he sponsored and voted for a bill prohibiting the use of federal funds to pay for abortions and said he had hope that "we will once again be a nation committed to honoring life from the moment of conception and ensuring American taxpayer dollars are never spent to end a life before it even begins."

He is currently a co-sponsor with 181 other legislators of the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act, which would bar abortion after 20 weeks except in cases of rape, incest or where the pregnancy poses a threat to the life or physical health of the mother.

In their text messages Edwards writes to Murphy: “[You] had zero issue posting your pro-life stance all over the place when you had no issue asking me to abort our unborn child just last week when we thought that was one of the options.”

Now I am not here to talk politics and I’m not trying to pile on because I truly feel for the Congressman. He was caught. He was caught in the worst way possible and I pray that he will be able to seek help and reconcile with his wife. But this situation provides a very unique opportunity to showcase the lengths a man can go to in order to keep his secret hidden.

This man went against everything he believed in and his values to protect this secret life of his. In the mind of an addict that is what is most important. They will lie, cheat, and steal to protect the secret. That, in essence, is the danger of assuming your husband doesn't struggle with porn (or any destructive behavior).

The statistics tell us that over 64% of men in the church use porn on a regular basis.

I believe most wives in the church think their husband is part of the 36% who don’t. They think this because he is an elder or deacon. He leads worship and studies his Bible. He is even a good father and loving husband. And I am sure that he is sincere in all of these things but the power of addiction is strong.

Do not think that because of your spouse’s deeds or his position will make him immune to the temptation of pornography. When the addiction has its way it twists reality and changes the way you think and rationalize things.

I guess my message is this: Stay vigilant, keep asking, and keep talking about this problem. Even if you’ve already asked him, ask again. Reaffirm your love for him regardless of what he’s done and strive for the truth above all.

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