Is your husband a man?
Does your husband have access to the internet?
Does your husband attend church activities regularly?
Do you and your husband talk frequently about how porn has affected his life?
Does your husband have accountability software on all of his internet accessing devices?
For the best results your answers should be: yes, yes, yes, no, no. If this isn’t the case with you then the percent for your husband is most likely higher. If you did get these answers then congratulations! There is only a 50% chance that your husband is addicted to pornography.
Now if you are like me, 50% isn’t really that good of odds. Statistics tell us that 50% of all Christian men admit to being addicted to porn. This isn’t even taking into account meaningful questions like: Did your husband come from a broken home? Does your husband spend time (either at work or home) by himself? Does your husband have a smart phone? Is your husband moody or sharp with you and your family some times? Answering yes to any one of these questions only multiplies the likelihood of your husband being addicted to porn.
This is terrible and it shouldn’t be like this, but this is the world that we live in. This is reality. Now what most women do even after hearing these stats is think (or lie to themselves) that they must be one of the lucky ones. Let me just say if this is where your mind is going right now please stop yourself. Take an honest look at your husband, not as someone that you hope and pray won’t let you down, but as someone you hope to share eternity with. Most addicted men, even when confronted by their spouses in the most loving way, will continue to lie about their addiction or tell half-truths that will make it seem like they aren’t truly addicted.
Now I’ve painted a very bleak picture for you here and worst case scenarios are probably playing out in your heads right now. This is not a “no win” situation here. There is a way out of this but you, as the wife, must tread softly remembering Paul’s admonition in Galatians 6:1 to “restore him in a spirit of gentleness.” This is not the time to fly off the handle and start accusing people of anything.
In my next article, we’ll talk about how to catch your husband looking at porn and why such an action is needed.
Help is on the way.